Today is the first day of October. The beginning of a new month. And it's also Friday. The end of a week. A loooong, bloody hard week.
A week where I've felt like I'm failing. Failing at work, failing as a parent, failing as a spouse, a sister, a daughter, a friend.
5 weeks ago I lost my Dad.
On a Friday night.
Friday night's used to be the best night of my week.
I'm worried Friday nights will never feel the same again.
But I'm still struggling with the grief and loss.
I hope one day it will be a happy time of the week again.
And I know one of the ways to get through this is by putting some effort in myself, reaching out to others, seeking support. Trying to ignore it, forget about it, avoiding it, pretending it will get easier won't help.
Even before Dad passed, I had time in my diary set aside every Friday afternoon to reflect, to end the week on a high. I called it my Mindful 5. I'd spend 15 minutes;
celebrating wins/what went well
addressing what didn't go so well
reflecting on what I ruminated on: should'a, would'a, could'a
setting goals for the week ahead (then halving them, and halving them again)
summing it all up in a powerful, positive sentence.
Sometimes it is really bloody hard to think of something positive.
Even doing something that shows hope for the future, for yourself or someone else can still boost positive emotions. It's simply about getting the body to release some of those good hormones - those naturally occurring, 'happy' hormones (which are explained more in mindset cards) that give your spirit a lift.
Some really simple things that boost positive emotions include:
thinking of or naming three things to be grateful for
talking to your kids about the best thing that happened that day to them
sharing a funny story/highlight of the week or day
turning the TV off and turning some music (or putting records) on
looking at photos of loved ones or holidays
forgiving and letting go of something or someone that's hurt you.
But the most important thing to remember is be kind to yourself. You're amazing, and you're going to be ok.
Stay safe out there.